labels are Not permanent

(this is written for Women, please read it from who you are ; )

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I read a message this morning and it made me think about all the critical labels that we put upon ourselves because we hear them from others, and then we carry them, believing that they are a part of us. But I know this is wrong, this is not truth, and I wanted to share this story with you that I wrote while I was thinking about this today.

You are more beautiful than you know, you are more special and beloved than you could ever imagine. Every woman is my beautiful Earth-Sister and we all have so much to share with one another. Even those we have never met in person, we can come to feel that we know one another when we share from our heart and the immense love that we, as women, carry there. We can be a light for this world, shining to guide others to know love, and to embrace it.

I have had so many labels-critical labels, diminishing labels, and degrading labels placed upon me. First by my dad and stepmothers, then, nonverbally, by the many (11, that I can remember) male perpetrators coming after my innocence without my consent, also by my covert-narcissist ex-husband of 30 years, and all repeated over and over in my own mind, towards my own self.

For so many years, I believed these labels were permanent, like scars on my knees from falling when I was young. I thought that these labels would always be there, staring me in the face whenever I looked in the mirror. Then, God did something in my life that changed my perspective on these labels.

I was given this large yellow hoodie, and it was way too big for me, so I decided to pass it on to someone for whom it would be a better fit.

But before I gave it away, God told me to write upon that hoodie, all of the ugly things that were said about me, all of the ugly beliefs I had in my own mind because of the treatment I had received in my life.

I wrote everything down, and these words covered the entire garment. God told me to put on the hoodie, then He told me that all of those words are words that kill, not words that give life. They kill our spirit, but His Spirit gives new life. See 2 Corinthians 3:6

God told me that just like when Lazarus came out of the grave, Jesus told them to remove the grave clothes that held him tightly bound in the grave:

John 11:43-44

1599 Geneva Bible

"As he had spoken these things, he cried with a loud voice, Lazarus, come forth. Then he that was dead, came forth, bound hand and foot with bands, and his face was bound with a napkin. Jesus said unto them, Loose him, and let him go."

God instructed me to remove this jacket, and, in so doing, I would be taking off all of those ugly labels that led to death. Hebrews 12 (1599 Geneva Bible (GNV)says: "Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without the which no man shall see the Lord. Take heed, that no man fall away from the grace of God: let no root of bitterness spring up and trouble you, lest thereby many be defiled."

Bitter words disrupt our peace; both our peace with others and our peace with ourselves, but especially our peace with God. Ugly, judgmental, critical words cause hopelessness and despair to take root in our hearts, and these defile us and the people with whom we interact in our day to day life. They cause division between us and God because our hearts sit in disagreement with what He has to say about us.

I rejoiced as I took off that garment and all of its ugly labels. I thought about burning that hoodie, but the practical, pragmatic, thrifty side of myself couldn't bear to see something go to waste if it could be used. So I decided to see if I could wash the words away in the laundry, then I could still give it away.

It came out pristine and golden, and the Lord told me this is how He is going to make me: pristine and golden, a shining light for his glory.

No matter how many labels are put upon us by others and even by our own beliefs about ourselves, God can wash it all away in his living water, with his Truth, with his life-giving Spirit. Let us give all of these labels over to God and let Him cleanse us and purify us so that we can come out like shining gold, the way we were born to be as his daughters.

Here is my new label: I am a surrendered, solid, structured, and serene daughter of the most high King. Who does God say you are in his eyes, and thus, in your future, with God's help?

"

- Jennifer Eileen May

 ·posted in THRIVE Facebook Group 18 Jan 25

{Guest Post} Realizing we are Priceless Precious Valuable

{Guest Post} by Pamela Maddock,
originally written in response to this Facebook post 

During some very low times

Feeling worthless was always present

I came in contact with a person 
who had a different eyes view of my situation.

We talked consistently

One day I was shown something in a sketch

A ladder 
a stick person on a ladder taking their first steps
like a little child trying to reach up for the first step.

At the top 3 rungs with these 3 words

Priceless

Precious

Valuable.

Then this person said

That's you.

The tears were many

The answer was up to me 
to look at my life and rise above everything else

Focus

Focus on me

I said I feel selfish

Reply

Be selfish for a while and heal me.

I am forever grateful.

....

I see that ladder sometimes

Take a deep breath and climb again.
It's called life and it really sucks sometimes.

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{Guest Post} by Pamela Maddock, in White Serving the Chalice at (her Anglo-Catholic) Church with a visiting Bishop and his wife, a few years back

(FYI I some spaces and bold to Pamela's original - WRW :)

{Guest Post) Are you willing to play the Bad Guy, if that is the Way of Healing?

Guest Post: Jo Hilder

It was five years ago today my husband Ben came home from rehab, after six months in a residential program being treated for alcoholism and depression.

The first three months he was in there we didn't see each other or speak, as we were separated for quite some time before I drove him to the rehab to be admitted, shook his hand and wished him a nice rest of his life.

I didn't know if I'd ever see him again, and went home to start filling in divorce papers.

I was talking to someone today about codependency, enabling and boundaries, and how hard it can be when somebody in a relationship, household or friendship has to be the bad guy, and start living for themselves.

I remember the day I made the choice to keep living the life Ben and I had started, and finish what we'd begun in my own. I remember deciding to leave him behind, because we could not both go down. I remember when I stopped begging him to change, to see, to hear, to want it like I did, and just let him go. The day when I finally saw him as a human being who needed help, help I could not give him, instead of seeing him as the husband who let me down, and could've done differently, if only.

When I stepped up and said, I can't change this, or him, but I can change, and I am willing to. Willing to make those choices. Willing to be the bad guy, if I have to, to be happy and finish what I started.
I don't now and will never understand how it came to be my man was given back to me, and me to him. It really is a miracle. But then, me not dying of cancer a few years before that was one too. There is not a day goes by now I am not grateful to not be alone right now, to have my man beside me. And I know he feels the same about me. God is good.

For all you honeys who are doing it really tough right now, who have had to be the bad guy, who have had to break something to fix it, who have had to keep going and finish what you started alone, can I just say, I stand back right now and give you the slow clap. I know it's hard. I know you cry. I know you think you can't. But you do anyway, unseen, unnoticed. Unthanked and unhelped. You're doing it. And you can be so proud. You need to know you're not invisible, and what you're doing isn't a waste of time. Hang in there, honey, it's going to work, and it's going to work out. You're doing a great job, and everything is going to be okay.

Christmas is a shit of a time. For those of us who have had to make those very, very hard choices, Christmas can be like one of those times you want to drop off the face of the earth. I just wanted to tell you, I know, me too. I believe in you. It's going to be okay.

And you're doing an awesome job, honey. Really, you are.

Love you lots,
Jo xxxxx

Guest Post: Jo Hilder

Jo is an Australian writer, coach and speaker: website.
She shepherds a highly-interactive & nourishing FB group: Free-range Christians

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